Video Text

Welcome

Hello and welcome to the Soul Partnership Foundations Masterclass. I’m Jared, your host and guide for this experience. Thank you for your time, energy, and interest in building and grounding a beautiful Soul Partnership 

My 3 Intentions for this masterclass are:

1. To deepen intimacy with your partner, and strengthen your ability to support each other in healing and growing into your fullest potential, your soul’s deepest longing.

2. To leave this training with 3 powerful practices that will support you both in aligning your dreams and visions, finding deep inner resources and the guidance to navigate the twists and turns of life.

3. To leave the masterclass with a deeper relationship and resonance with me and my work. You might even find yourself excited and curious to do deeper work with me.

I have been working as a coach, mentor, guide, and facilitator for over 20 years in the world of personal development, communication, romantic relationships, rites of passage, and deep healing work. I support clients in doing their individual healing, as well as working together with their partner to drive up, process, and heal those hard to reach areas that often need the most attention. 

As healing happens, space is made for your more authentic and beautiful self to shine through. 

So what is a Soul Partnership?

A romantic relationship between two people in which the highest value and commitment of the relationship is to undertake and support each other’s healing and growth, individually and collectively unfolding into the truest, most beautiful, most powerful version of yourselves.

You each commit to supporting your partner’s journey of healing and growth, in service to life.

Soul Partnership isn’t something I made up or intended to create with my wife. It feels like we were called to it.

We both chose the same field of work: facilitating groups and mentoring individuals to heal old, limiting patterns.

This set the stage for a unique kind of romantic relationship. One in which we share, reflect, and support each other’s growth. We’ve naturally developed practices and structures to support us in growing more fully into our Soul’s deepest longing.

This training will lay out the 3 Practices that have fundamentally supported my wife and I in creating and nourishing a deeply fulfilling “Soul Partnership”. I help my clients implement them to transform their relationships, and I can help you do the same.

Orientation

Here’s how to engage and participate with this training, to get the most out of it

I highly recommend taking this training with your partner. If that’s not possible, you can still gain a lot of value from taking this alone. But set aside time to share what you’re learning with your partner, and encourage them to take the training as soon as possible.

You’ll want a quiet and private space where you can watch this video, take notes, and experiment with each practice. You’ll also need a journal and pen to take notes and respond to writing prompts I’ll offer you

I invite you to fully participate with each practice in this training, even if it feels new and awkward at times.

Your romantic relationship can be the single greatest source of support and grounding in your adult life. By investing in your partnership, you’re investing in a beautiful life, together.

Let’s get started with the first practice

Practice One: Zoom Out, Release, and Dream

The first practice I’ll be leading you through is called “Zoom out, release, and Dream”

Early in our relationship, my wife and I would lay together in front of the fireplace and take turns sharing our dreams and visions together. We didn’t think much about it, other than it was fun to do. Over the following few years, a lot of those visions became reality. We looked back and realized we were doing the work and living in the home we had envisioned. Over time we continued to dream together and this practice continued to develop into a more and more focused process. Now we take time each winter to reflect and complete our previous year, as well as vision and dream up the coming year.

All too often as couples we get stuck in the weeds of our day to day lives together. We get wrapped up in work, family, managing our home, and our social calendar.

It’s so important to set aside time and space to leave the day to day life behind, and zoom out with your partner. Take a bird’s eye view of your life.

I recommend doing at least one big session per year, ideally early in the year.

But no matter what time of year it is, there’s always value in zooming out on your view of life to get your bearings and strategize how to get where you want to go.

My wife and I now follow a detailed process each year to release old patterns and layers of ourselves that are no longer serving, as well as reflect on the many ways in which the world communicates with and guides us on our path. We come out of our process with a clear vision of what wants to come through us in the following year.

This is a time to connect and sync with each other. Time to review and complete unresolved items from the past year. Time to feel into the more subtle and mysterious energies moving through us.

The process my wife and I, as well as my clients use is pretty extensive, with a lot of time and energy required. For the format of this class, I’ve simplified and streamlined everything down to 3 simple steps.

But first, let’s get you set up.

Find a blank piece of paper, and along the left edge, write out the following areas of your life with enough space to answer some questions. Now, draw a line down the center of your paper, from top to bottom. This should give you two equal sized sections for each area of life:

• Romantic Relationship

• Sex

• Family

• Friends

• Finances

• Work/Career

• Fitness/Health

• Travel/Adventure/Vacation

• Personal Development

• Hobbies

If there is another big area of your life that isn’t represented here, go ahead and add it.

Step 1

Take a few minutes in each area of life and answer these questions in the left section:

What results do I/we have in this area (good and bad)? What do you have to show in this area? What are the facts?

How do I/We feel about the state of this area? Is this area going well or not so good?

Pause the video to respond individuality, and then to discuss your answers with your partner. Where are there differences and similarities in your answers?

Step 2

Take a few more minutes in each area of life to answer these questions in the right section. Over the next year…

What do I want this area to look like? What do we want to take on? What new results do we want to have?

How do we want to feel about this area?

Pause the video now to answer these questions for each area.

Take time to discuss your answers to each question with your partner. Where are there differences and similarities?

Step 3

Your next step is to keep dreaming by creating a visual display that you keep in a place where you will see and interact with it a lot throughout the year.

My wife and I do a “mind map” on a big sheet of paper and hang it on the wall in our dining room.

This forces us to see it daily, to think about it, and discuss it with each other.

There’s an added bonus that when friends and family see it, they ask us questions, which reinforces what we’re creating for the year.

To wrap this practice, take a moment to look back over what you’ve written down.

What jumps out at you? What feels uncomfortable? What feels exciting?

Final Questions/Prompts to reflect on:

• What would you need to do to have the past year really feel complete? Sit with this question for some time and write down whatever comes to mind. It could look like  having a difficult conversation with a co-worker or family member. It could be forgiving yourself or someone else. It could be giving yourself a self care day because you got present to how hard you’ve been pushing yourself. Take action on as many things on this list as you can!

• What structures can you put in place this coming year to continue exploring and engaging with the dreaming you’ve done in each area? How can you move each of these dreams towards real things and experiences in your life?

Practice Two - Feeding Your Dreams and Visions with Erotic Energy

Our second practice is called “Feeding your Dreams and Visions with Erotic Energy.”

About 7 years into our marriage, my wife, Laurie and I experienced a slow but steady increase in eros energy. At the time it manifested in curiosity and desire to romantically and sexually connect with other people, which resulted in a very wild and bumpy ride of exploring polyamory.

In more recent years this rising eros energy has appeared in the form of exploring and healing trauma around our erotic desires, our bodies, and our pleasure. As we heal our wounds and explore our pleasure we’ve unlocked powerful stores of intimacy, creativity, and magic. This powers our healing and development process as we become more fully ourselves, and learn to serve our people deeply.

This sensual practice will help you build your intimacy and skill in working with and focusing eros energy to bring your visions and dreams into your lived experience in a process called “Sex Magic”

Sex Magic is any practice in which people engage with erotic, sensual, or sexual energy for therapeutic, spiritual, or ceremonial reasons. In other words, it’s not so much about scratching a sexual itch, as it is cultivating and focusing this potent energy towards becoming the kind of person you want to be and manifesting the world you want to live in. Eros is the power of creation. The desire and longing for new life to come into the world. Eros is the energy that brought you to this life, and to your partner.

The practice I’ll walk you through in a moment will include some sensual and sexual touch. We’ll start slow, and build up gradually.

But first, let’s get you set up. You’ll want to set your space to be comfortable. Eros energy thrives in romantic settings, so find a cozy spot to sit or lay down, in a quiet and private place without interruptions. Soften or lower the light with candles or dimming lamps. Play some music that gets you connected to your sensuality, and pleasure. Light some incense or diffuse an essential oil that feels sexy. Get the space nice and warm so you’ll be comfy with fewer clothes on.

Next, I recommend taking a few minutes to get into your body, and out of your head. Do a few yoga postures, roll around on the ground, run around, dance to some music, or wrestle with each other a bit. It doesn’t need to be fancy, it just needs to bring your awareness into your physical body and senses.

Ok, now let’s settle in and get comfy. You can undress, or wear something that helps you feel sexy.

If you’re doing this with your partner, choose who will give, and who will receive first. If you’re doing this on your own, you’ll be holding both roles at the same time.

We’ll do two rounds of this practice. Round 1 we’ll focus on sensual touch and in Round 2 you’ll have the option to explore sexual touch.

Before dropping in, let’s take a few deep breaths together to ground ourselves. Slow and deepen your breath, inviting your body and mind to slow down, relax, and find stillness. Let the stresses of the day fall away for now so you can be fully present, right here, right now.

Create an intention for your session. What do you want to focus this eros energy you’ll be cultivating, towards? What area of your life, visions, dreams, or desires will you be calling in through this Sex Magic practice?

Ok, here we go.

Round 1

Agree on an area of the Receiver’s body that feels comfortable to explore with some sensual touch. I recommend doing this practice on bare skin, but I trust you to adapt this practice to feel right for you. For this round, I recommend avoiding areas of the body that are more likely to elicit more sexual energy such as the chest or genital area. It’s important to walk before you run!

The Giving partner can begin softly touching and exploring the other’s body. The intention of your touch should be to connect and explore your partner in a way that feels good to you. You’ll want to avoid touch that can break the mood, irritate your partner, or step over their boundaries. But beyond that, allow yourself to explore the many textures, temperatures, shapes, and sensations you’re receiving through touch. Zoom your attention into the spot where your fingertips physically connect with your partner’s skin. Close your eyes if it helps tune into those sensations more clearly. Alternate between touching with your fingertips and touching with your full hand. Explore different pressures from light and feathery, to firmer and deeper. Once you get the hang of this, I invite you to add another layer by opening up your eyes if you’ve closed them, and take in your partner visually. Notice the shape of them, of their curves and edges. Take in the color of their skin, hair, and eyes. Notice how the light plays with their body.

The Receiving partner’s job is simply to feel as much as possible through touch. I recommend closing your eyes or using a blindfold to help you quiet any interfering sensation beyond touch. Notice how it feels to have your partner touch you in a way that is deeply gratifying and pleasurable for them. Again, once you feel like you’ve gotten the hang of this, you can add a layer to the experience by opening your eyes and taking in your partner visually.

If you are practicing this alone, start touching your skin with eyes closed. Find a balance between what feels good for your hand to touch, and how good it feels to be touched by your hand. Alternate your awareness from one to the other, and ultimately, try to experience the pleasure of both simultaneously. When you’re ready to add the visual layer, open your eyes and take in your own body. Allow yourself to find pleasure in your body’s visual beauty.

As you get more comfortable with this practice, continue to explore what’s happening inside your body and mind. Tune into your pleasure. The part of you that is enjoying themself and wants more. Lean into that part. Invite them to take up more space in you. What sensations are sparking and swirling in you? Do you notice any images or scenes in your mind’s eye?

Pause this video and continue to explore for a period of time that feels good. I recommend starting with 10 minutes or so. Remember to hold your intention for this session in mind as you give and receive touch. When the time is up, take a moment to jot down any reflections or notes in your journal. Then switch roles so you both get a chance to experience being the Giver and the Receiver of this sensual touch round 1.

Round 2

Ok, I hope you’re enjoying some delicious waves of Eros energy flowing through your body now. You can continue with the sensual touch for as long as you like, ramping the eros up and down as you like. Or you can take things a step further by introducing some sexual touch. I recommend pausing the video to discuss any boundaries, requests, or needs either of you may have about what kind of touch you’re open to in this session, and what is off the table. As you’re getting comfortable with this practice, I recommend limiting touch to the outside of the body, so no penetration, and the Giver only using their hands.

Switch back to your original roles. The Giver will begin by touching their partner the same as before. The main difference this time is that you may begin to explore areas closer to, and including your partner’s genitals. You’re still touching with the intention of stoking your own pleasure, building Eros energy up. Enjoy yourself and explore your partner’s body inside of the limits you agreed upon prior. You’ll likely notice a dramatic increase in Eros energy moving through your body. Go slow, and build your capacity to hold and work with higher levels of energy.

The receiver should follow the same instructions from Round 1. Take it all in and notice how your inner world is impacted and influenced by the rise in Eros energy. Stay grounded in your breath and body. Bring your intentions for this session to mind and visualize all of this energy flowing through as it generates a powerful gravity field, drawing your visions and dreams towards you with velocity.

Ready? Ok, pause the video, set your time limit, and switch roles after jotting down any reflections in your journal.

Restart the video when you’re ready to reflect and complete this practice.

After you’ve completed your session as I’ve laid it out, you may really want to make love together. I totally understand, and I encourage you to finish this part of the training before indulging yourself. Let the sexual tension fuel these last few steps.

Take some time to meditate, go for a walk, and/or journal on your experience. Care for your body by using the restroom, drinking some water, or nibbling on a snack.

There’s also a great opportunity to take some time to use all this eros energy you’ve built towards a creative pursuit. Draw or paint something, write some poetry, or play some music. Where could you invest this creative energy other than through sex?

Restart the video when you’re ready to debrief the experience with your partner.

Come back together with your partner and share your experiences with each other. Here’s a few questions to get you started: How did you feel? What did you notice as the Eros energy rose? If the Eros rose and fell in cycles, how did that roller coaster feel in your body? Did either of you see things in your mind's eye? Take some time to discuss and reflect on your experience. Share some gratitude or acknowledgement with each other for being vulnerable and exploring with you.

Next, review the intention you set at the beginning of this practice. Where were you focusing your eros energy? How do you now feel towards those visions and dreams you’re calling in?

Beautiful work. I hope you will take this practice and make it your own. Find how it works best for you and keep going deeper.

Here are a few Questions to reflect and journal on:

• What would be possible if you kept practicing this, in addition to your regular lovemaking sessions?

• How could Eros energy, and learning to work with it, fuel what you’re up to in life?

Practice Three - Couples who trance together, stay together

This practice is all about the magic that becomes possible when we create a ceremonial container and alter our consciousness with intention.

Laurie and I practice trance together in many ways. From dancing together, yoga, meditation, up to and including sitting with sacred medicines. Each week, we have a special date night where we dress up, prepare and enjoy a delicious dinner, and then drop into a ceremonial space, working with intentions we’ve set. The ceremony looks different from week to week, but it always provides us with insights from beyond our everyday consciousness. By practicing this together, we’re able to find guidance in hard times, and deeper clarity on what the world needs from us.

For this practice, I will be teaching you about Ceremonial containers and how to create them for deeper work. I will also guide you on an inner journey through an altered state of mind where you can find guidance and grounding.

But first let’s talk about ceremony. I’m sure you’ve heard this word used in many different ways. For our purposes today, I’ll define ceremony as an intentionally created sacred space to connect, communicate, and receive guidance. This is the space where our nervous system can deeply surrender and open to greater wisdom and love.

This conversation may be triggering for some. Especially those who have grown up in more conservative religious communities. I’ve had my own journey with practices that wade into the spiritual end of the pool, and can easily say that finding my own authentic relationship with these practices, which my ancestors have practiced for millenia, helps me feel so much more connected and grounded in my relationships and life in general. My most profound healing and transformation has happened in ceremonial spaces. If the idea of ceremony, and altered states of mind bring up hard thoughts and feelings, I invite you to create a new relationship with this ancient practice. As best you can, meet this practice with fresh eyes and ears.

Let’s get you set up by preparing your space and physical body for this experience. Find a spot that is quiet and private. You can either sit up straight in a meditative posture, or lie down. Whatever helps you feel comfortable and alert enough to remain awake. I recommend low lighting or an eye mask. I will be guiding you through a guided meditation, so make sure you can hear me clearly throughout the experience. Have some water and your journal nearby.

Here are a few tips to get the most out of this meditation: Focus your attention on my voice. If thoughts distract you, just find your way back to my voice. I will guide you where to go and what to do. Use your imagination to visualize and feel what I’m saying. If you struggle to experience what I’m describing, it’s possible an inner skeptic of yours is blocking things. As much as possible, try to just go with the flow, and give everything the benefit of the doubt. A phrase I often offer clients is to just “Make it right”. At some point during the meditation, you may find some discomfort or disorientation, especially if exploring your inner world is new. If this happens, all you have to do is open your eyes, sit up and connect to your surroundings. Use each of your senses to connect with the world around you. Once the discomfort recedes, you can restart the meditation.

The last thing to dial in before we get started is your intention for this ceremony. Take some time to consider this prompt: What is a question or situation you could use some guidance or clarity around? Share what arises with your partner. Write your intention down in your journal.

You’re all set! Get set up, and restart the video when you’re ready to begin

[Watch or listen to the guided meditation]

Welcome back! I hope your inner journey was meaningful and supportive. Take some time now to journal what you experienced in as much detail as you can remember. These imaginal realms are much like dreams and will fade with time.

Next, share your experience with your partner. Ask each other questions about anything that jumps out at you or feels significant. Make sure you only ask questions that help deepen each others curiosity and engagement with the experience. Avoid interpreting things for them or jumping to conclusions. Let the mystery of it all remain mysterious. Clarity will come with time.

Final questions/prompts to reflect on

• What would it be like to regularly check in with this deeper aspect of yourself and find guidance for each step of your journey in life?

• How could a practice like this support you and your partner in your couple goals?

Thank you for engaging with this practice. I hope it was meaningful and when you’re ready, we’ll begin to wrap the class together.

Wrapping Up

Now that you’ve had some time to reflect, share with your partner what you’ve learned and are taking with you from this training.

Next, share some ideas on structures or practices you can schedule into your lives to keep this work alive going forward. How can you customize these practices to really support you?

Take a few minutes to close your eyes and imagine taking on these 3 practices with your partner. What do you see? How would your lives and relationship look different?

To wrap this experience, I invite you to sit facing your partner, or if you’re doing this solo, look at yourself in the mirror. Take turns thanking each other for how you showed up and engaged with this training.

Thank you for trusting me and engaging with these practices. May they bring you as much healing and guidance as they have brought Laurie and I.

I recommend taking some time on your own, or with your partner to go for a walk outside, in a more natural environment. Go at a slow pace, and either think through or discuss your experiences in this training. Avoid coming to any conclusions just yet. Just reflect on my sharing and the practices. Let your mind turn them over as you move your body. Pay attention to the non-human world around you as you do this. What’s the weather today? Is there wind, sun, warmth or cold? What are the birds doing? As you reflect, notice how the natural world is expressing. The natural world has an uncanny ability to mirror things for us. To lead us where we need to go.

Thank you so much for joining me on this journey and taking on these practices. They’ve made a massive difference for me and the people I work with, and I really hope they serve you. I’ll also say, these practices are simplified and streamlined, as I said earlier. You will likely find more value by doing deeper work. However, doing deeper work requires us to be live together, whether that’s on a zoom call or in person if you’re local.

I offer you my invitation to reach out and schedule a discovery call with me if this masterclass really supported you, brought up curiosity or interest. I’d love to talk to you more about how this work could go further and support you and your partner in bigger and bigger ways, in what you’re up to and what you deeply care about.

Thank you again, and I hope to talk to you soon!